Friday, January 1, 2010

A true story: don't get sniped whilst playing with your tool;-)

This is a true, but somewhat tongue-in cheek,
story. Whilst I did draw sniper fire as the
platoon Sgt's radioman (as did many other
people), but some jobs more than others:-).

But, there was one occasion where I
wasn't carrying the radio, and could
have been sniped at, and decided that if
I were...I didn't want to be found in an
embarrassing position:-)

I was at FSB (Fire Support Base) Charlie II
-our home base, and had to relieve another
man...(let's call him avoid embarrassment)
from his shift of guard duty-perimeter watch
(2-4 hours-I'm not sure).

Jackson, was another good man from 2nd platoon,
and possibly my team leader at the time. He was
the grenadier-'Blooper' man; he carried the blooper-
M-79 grenade launcher...and was excellent at it(I
wouldn't have wanted to be on the receiving end of
his fire) On this day Jackson was taking me to relieve
B of his shift.

As we got nearer to the bunker Jackson noticed that B
wasn't on top or around the bunker; he wasn't visible.
Jackson got pissed when he realized that B might be
'copping some ZZZ (sleep). It's a major NO-NO in war,
but it happens. I learned how to sleep with my eyes
open;-) But, shit the snoring kind of gives you away;-)
I was never caught...and to scared to sleep.

( an aside: I was in an Amsterdam coffee shop after an exam,
and I closed my eyes for a bit. I was just trying to
remember my answer to one question when the
bouncer, Pete, tapped my shoulder and said to wake
up, or no sleeping. He was just checking to see...

I told him that I learned to sleep with my eyes
open in Vietnam, so he better check me even if my
eyes are open;-) )

But, as we got close to the bunker, Jackson and then I
heard heavy breathing. There are no women there, but
loads of porn magazines of all types...Swedish etc. So, you
get my drift? B was just taking care of his needs, or releasing
stress, if that sounds better;-) He had more time in the Nam
than both of us combined.

Jackson whispered what we'd do. As we came to the top
of the hill we got up and ran towards the bunker door with
our rifles, and we screamed 'Gooks' several times, or such.

What we saw was a man trying to finish what he was doing,
whilst at the same time trying to put his pecker back into his
pants like it never happened, and we never saw it...AND grab
his rifle and respond to the threat he just heard...from us.

After they left...and Jackson probably warned me about
sleeping and... I decided to sit on top of the bunker. It was a
beautiful day. And, being me...I tried to think of what B
did wrong...(I did the same in criminal law class. Whilst the
professor was explaining what part of the law was violated
in a criminal act, and why; I would always be thinking...the
guy, or woman was stupid. He/she should have done this or

So, as I was sitting there atop the bunker it came to me. I said to
myself B should have done it right here on top of the bunker...
that way there be no suspicion because he would be visible, and if
done right no one would see.

And, then, I saw what the end of that scenario could be, and put
that idea out of my head.

I pictured myself being found laying on my side. A snipers bullet
through my skull, my dick in my right hand, and a porn magazine
in my left hand with blood all over the place...and giving everyone
a big laugh.

So, I just enjoyed the nice day;-)


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